11.15.02 - 5:28 am

i dont really feel like sleeping. part of me does, my eye parts do at least. but the rest of me could go on for hours, sitting, thinking of things that are relevant to the moment and then shutting down inbetween my requests to think. the most important thing concerning me for the most part is what to do after this. what to do to keep the momentum going. before this i was reading donnie darko reviews. before that i was sending my story to sarah. before that i was reading posts in a beginners salt water reef forum. before that i downloaded some fluid program and before that i was extending the memory of my computer from one megabyte of free space to approximately 4.4 gigabytes of free space. not too bad. but that was several hours ago, when i still had not only the option but the incentive to go to sleep. class. its going to approach and its going to want me to be active, attentive and responsive. but alas, as of now i am, as of then i most likely wont be. i cant really even tell if im going to fall asleep at all while the sun is still set. i was thinking about fireplaces. where they are, who has them, and my lack of them. i was thinking about how good my pizza tasted, and how for $14.24, is it really worth it? why do i splurge for taste and not health? i have another beard coming. this one looks better for some reason. im still stuck on the choice to trim, in order for every hair to be the same length and allow others to catch up, or not to shave, and just let it do its disgusting stringy tenticle like growth. either way, people spend way too much time with pills and self help videos. raping them of their contents so that they feel better, feel thinner, feel prettier, feel better in bed, feel more calm, feel happy, feel content......how depressing its become to have the only contentment around found in a plastic bottle guarded by cotton balls. sarah thornton is guarded by the very same thing.