11.27.03 - 2:41 am

i was mad, so i told her to fuck off.

the confusion of judgement is that she will drink to get drunk holding ashton, but refuses to let me take ashton for an hour to see my grandparents and his great grandparents who have seen him only once or not at all. shell leave ashton with her mom, from 11 am to 2 pm to work at mcdonalds, but me taking him for an hour is unacceptable. out of the question if she cant be around.

i dont know what im going to tell my family tomorrow when ashton doesnt get to show up, because his mother apparently thinks hes too young for him to come out with me. that he needs to nurse. that he needs sarah. and sarah alone. that he will be "strewn about" family member to family member.

since hes reached 4 months ashton has:

- been to the beach at least twice

- been to at least two movies

- been to several parties

- been on airplanes

- been to massachusettes

- been to arizona

- been to at least two concerts

- been baby sat by one of my friends for two hours

- been baby sat by me for two hours

- been with me and only to the bank, my work and to the store during a 45 minute break from his mother

this necessitates that he needs her. always. no question about it. absolutely is too young to be at my house for thanksgiving. she just cares too much. she worries. and rightly so. the house containing my family has just too much to consider in regards to actually conceiving of letting a 4 month old infant anywhere near us.

so apparently shes fucking off for good.

ill admit, not the best way to end a conversation with someone.

i just dont see her point.