04.13.09 - 10:05 am

zoo!

our turbotourism didnt stop there. next up was the phoenix zoo. there was a constant need to remind ashton that he didnt always have to put up his fingers, stick out his tongue and make a rockstar face whenever someone was taking his picture. i dont know how dusty programmed him to do this for every goddamn photograph, but it grew tiresome immediately. with his insect cage wristwatch and the copper bracelet he insisted he have from the grand canyon, we visited a vast zoo in what was probably the hottest day of our time in arizona. the little squirrel monkeys were the best part; like little people. so adorable. i want one. they like to pee on everything, rumor has it.

the rays.

ashtons favorite part was, most expectedly, the sting ray exhibit. like the one julie and i enjoyed at seaworld, here you reach your hands into the circulating swarm of stingrays and childishly enjoy. so smooth. the tiny ones are adorable. like little alien creatures you want to just take home with you and have flapping around at your feet before you leave for work.

finale.

ashton slept alot. i dont know if it was the weather or over stimulation or him growing, but he was always napping. we looked for snakes and spiders and scorpions, but turned up empty handed. i think it was still just too cold. i wore a sweater for the first three days of our time there. i drank lots of orange juice in the morning and enjoyed some delicious tuna fish sandwiches for lunch. ashton collected cactus spines and "crystal" rocks. he spent a hour making massive rock slides repeatedly destroy a civilization under a small cliff. but no snakes. no tarantulas. i was just as disappointed as he was.

JW

my aunt and uncle work at the premiere resort in phoenix. they have beautiful white trunked palm trees, large marble entryways, huge pools, restaurants and a lazy river. ashton very much enjoyed this. there are dozens of inflatable rings that you sit in, hold onto or glide solo with as a gentle current loops you around. julie kept her nose deep within a twilight book while ashton and i played in the water. it was just a bit too cold for me, but ashton stayed wet the entire time.
this marriott hosts the prestigious "fight night". this is a parkinsons disease fundraiser orchestrated by muhammad ali and this years event raised over six million dollars. i imagine the cost of organizing and paying off celebrities and the fee from the marriott equals about that by the time its all over. there is a red carpet, there are wines and champagnes, there are bon jovis and josh grobins. there are forest whitakers who sing a single song for nearly $150,000; although his song was impromtu and encouraged by other members of the audience. i would later hear that some guy stood up and offered to pay $10,000 to hear him sing if he could get ten other people to offer the same. some asshole threw down $50,000 when only nine people joined the other guys bid. my aunt took ashton, julie and i through the entire ballroom event just a few hours before it was set to begin. there was memorabilia for auction, there was automobile giveaways, there was stage sound checks with the lights and volume thundering in my chest, there was people walking around everywhere carrying all sorts of items, and there were stern looking security guards protecting every door way. each seat around the main stage cost $7500. the seats at the back of the ballroom cost $1500. absurd. last year my aunt got an autographed pair of boxing gloves from ali.
the visiting celebrities would be snuck in through a back entrance, but the main entrance is where we had to exit. here we would see a crowd of gawkers and hotel folk all horded around the door way hoping to catch a glimpse of some celebrity entering the ballroom. this was the entrance for the super wealthy however. each extravagantly dressed couple that entered was welcomed with a trumpet announcement, like they were royalty entering their castle. they walked down a long walkway from their valet parked bentlys, porsches and escalades. and thats exactly the way we three had to go to get to our modestly priced caliber.

ashton in his swim trunks, julie in her bathing suit and me holding my backpack and fully inflated shamu killer whale pool toy standing awkwardly alongside the amateur paparazzi.

"do it," they whispered tauntingly to us, knowing we needed to get to our car beyond the flowing stream of wealthy couples. so we did. keeping to the side of them, we passed gowns and tuxedos and trumpets like a trio of arrogant middle class tourists. but it made for an amusing visual.

flights.

to get home, ashton and i needed to leave the house at 545 am. hurriedly, all three of us packed in to the caliber and sped through morning traffic to get to the airport. julies flight didnt leave til 10 am, and so would stay behind to drop off the car. ashton and i meanwhile, running late were met with the worrysome sight of an endless line at the check in counter. when we finally reached our computer, they told me they didnt have time to print me out a ticket. that they couldnt guarantee my luggage would make the flight. i had to run. so we did. only to see another endless swarm of travelers at the security check point. there was no way i was going to make my flight. suddenly a voice called out saying there was a special path for parents with children passengers to take. this skipped us completely ahead of everyone else and got us to our gate as they were boarding the last handful of people. if it hadnt been for that special line, there was no way i would have made my flight.

i tried to sleep away my exhaustion while ashton diligently played monsters vs aliens on my cell phone. my father picked us up from the airport and i got ashton to school on time for his noon class as planned.

boom. vacation done. julie and i both spent betwen $500 and $600 each. flights. food. travel. hotel stay. tourist hot spots. everything fell into place. except for the weather part. due to the chilly temperature, only my exposed face was tanned. my torso and legs, covered in sweaters and jeans, stayed nice and oregon pale.