04.14.13 - 12:43 pm

and then there was this little gem posted on facebook for everyone to see:

Hey billy ray. Okay so listen: you come at me with these fucking Christina messages right.. But did u take into consideration any of the following: 1) the fact that over the last few months since I've known you, ive complained sporadically about my baby daddy who figured out my Facebook password & pretended to be me on my profile numerous times sending messages to my friends?
2) thought about the fact that when Christina told you I had friend req her and sent her messages talking shit about you, I was woke up where I had been sleeping the previous 12 hours and prior to that, been with you a few mdays ?? Not to mention that when this got brought up, you and i talked about it. Not breifly. I logged into BOTH my face books right in front of u to see if I had them in my inbox (no - whoever sent the messages from my account had deleted them from my inbox)
3. Think about the fact that I've never stolen from you. Never took anything, nevertalked shit, always been completely respectful and polite to anyone I meet with you (including any ex girlfriends or girls) respectful of your moms home, keeping your room clean while helping around the house any time I could - and never having a single person or friend of mine over outta respect of ur moms place.

Maybe, before going on a tangent to your 'friends' on the Facebook message bullshit, you could've factored those facts into the story or just use your little brain a fucking minute?

So you and Mikey....
You said it wasn't cool to write a letter to him while I was hanging with you just this last week...well, news flash: you&i weren't/arent together. We were hanging out a few days. Its a free country. when u started getting butthurt about who knows what then told me how you felt, i said exactly what i have been about not loving you enough, and when realised how itd been hurting you thought it would be a good thing to leave. as to not have you suffer. but Can u not handle it billy? Really. Man the fuck up

Mikey and I were together first. You and him were friends, then when he goes to jail you flirt with schmooze and have a relationship with me? Sounds to me, really, that u kinda fucked him over first. I will take half the blame for this as well, because it wasn't something I should've done. But me pointing this out to you doesn't deserve a punch in the head Thai hard. Doesn't deserve a punch at all. And NOBODY should be held up in a room (told theyre not allowed to leave, told that theyre the ones who should 'respect') - that shits just sick and twisted - after getting sucker punched by someone like YOU over something so BITCH.
I liked you, i thought i liked you. we had a lot of fun and laughes and nice times together billy and I felt like I could trust you, and I told you I had feelings for you, told you I loved you because I FELT it. I wasn't bullshitting, if I don't like a motherfucker I'm not gonna hang with him. Period. Don't matter if he's got a million dollars. Whatever was there between us at the time dwindled after a few instances...my feelings changed. That's not a crime. I told you they did. I told you what I was doing that night.. I was honest. All the time.
You don't like that I don't like you like that way now, you can't handle it so much that you wanna just blame me for it all. You wanna Play the victim roll, so much that you give ME a clock to the fuckin head. I have a black eye from your pussy ass. It is what it is billy, you're a fuckin psycho mamas boy who can't be told no a day in his life, and definitely can't fess up to the fact that I just got to know you a little better, and didn't like you like that anymore.. Now I see more reason for my intuition back then. If there had been ANY bit of compassion, or need to make it work between us in the future, it's COMPLETELY gone and I've lost all respect, or positive thoughts I had on you.
End of story.

Maybe you should start with not always finding a way or reason to HATE someone just because they aren't doing/saying/being who you want them to be.
Your a fucked up motherfucker. Get help. I mean that, it's not a joke.

and naturally, this is billy ray:

and this is what has become of sarah. shes on food stamps. listed as a transient. her self esteem so low that she seeks out people like billy ray for shelter. companionship. she dates people who go to prison. and then sleeps with their friends. she does drugs and ignores her children.

all of this would go away if she just valued herself. i really struggle with wanting to help her. in some way. get her off drugs. tell her positive things. see her succeed at something in her life and become a normal human being again. but this will never be the case, and i have to remind myself that helping her is not my job nor am i even capable of such things. she has to do this on her own. she has to want this. and right now she does not.

and, almost ten years on i am still wishing she would still just go away.