05.06.02 - 1:41 am

russell presley: my ass is bruised from sitting on your bike backwards

there is a growing fear inside me that my feelings toward sarah are going to be unreciprocated. her best friend annoyingly reassures me time and time again, that she is still very much "in love" with me. but the communication is different between me and her. instead of we talking, its me talking. asking instead of being asked. maybe she is as frustrated as i am at having a semi relationship over keyboards and computer screens. i would be. i am.

or maybe, she finds the sillyness in it all, and doesnt take my affections seriously. it would be nice to find the girl that enjoys you as much as you enjoyed them, and that feeling of....necessity, was thick in the air. i think im looking for that. i want it with sarah, but im afraid i will become a phase. a moment of.......temporarity.

i introduced red cyano into my sump/refugium unintentionally. and i just know its going to piss me off later.