12.13.03 - 5:33 pm

sarah used her "i had sex tonight" card for the first time last night.

it was expected because she was so mad at me for lying about me working or not. but the way she phrased it made it worse: "ok, you asked for it. thanks for lying to me jordan, and to give you an idea of how much it hurts, i had sex tonight. without you."

retaliation sex. the fear that she will have sex to hurt me. because she knows it will. but its funny to me that she knows it will. that it even does at all. i wish it wouldnt. i wish she didnt know that it would.

how many wishes do people use up a day?

"can you tell if im lying to try to hurt you on purpose, or telling the truth?"