05.24.04 - 1:12 am

alone and sober.

so many projects. so many new priorities. back seats and hiatus. problems and new complications.

figures.

being alone, regardless of what other people say, is wonderful. as much as i enjoy other people, their company and experiences, isolation and without appeals to me always.

me and cody.

yesterday became a day that i really felt something different. something new. something exciting.

and considering the circumstances, all together pleasant.

i enjoyed ashton.

he was adorable. he was intelligent. responsive. he was naked. he was hilarious.

he was delightful.

hes growing up and becoming more and more of a little person. hes becoming so fast what i see at my work every day. a little boy who points and asks what is this? how does that work? what happens when i do this?

a boy and his father.

me and ashton.

i cant wait for the days when i can take him and have him for a workless weekends of adventure, exploration and education. sleep overs. dinners. beaches. zoos. parks. pictures.

i can feel my pumping fish tank vibrating the wood at my feet.

making believe by social distortion is playing.

and my hands are stuck in a twisting position, inhibiting my fingers from hitting the desired keys.

its time for school and time for bed.