11.04.05 - 2:28 am

low, warm light obscurring view. only silhouettes spinning infront of trees. the speed is faster than natural. suddenly the clip changes. theres lots of blues and greens. a small child in a lawn on an overcast day. a pale light illuminating the room and the faces watching. the clip changes again.

short pieces of memories. none of those mine.

at this hour, mine would play as follows:

venetian blinds and tan sheets. somewhere in wilsonville. completely awkard and unsure.

pitch black. tall grasses surrounding hands, legs and hair. someone stands first. one figure pulls the other into one dark shapeless mass.

a mass of bouncing balls. colors. city streets.

these places are warm. these places slip just beyond the reach of my fingers. when i find them, i watch them over and over again. sitting off to the side in a dark jacket and jeans as the camera pans over the scene.

i hope somewhere in death, all the moments that ever meant something can be found and experienced again like pressing buttons on television remote.