01.03.07 - 11:21 pm

A COLLECTION OF MESSAGES FROM MY PHONE

hey buddy, its TJ. long time no see. i heard about your amazingly cool prank, and the results of it. im sorry buddy that sucks. anyways, i know that you always have these sweet ass halo parties, or i dont know, whatever you want to call them. where everyone just hangs out and drinks a little bit or gets fucked up or does whatever. i told tim to let me know next time you had one to call or we could just hang out some time cause�i uh, miss you. and deep down i think i kind of love you. so you know, if you could give me a shout back id really appreciate it. talk to you later buddy. see ya.

fucking nigger. you fuck. what the fuck are doing. you dont even have a fucking job, you fucking worthless faggot. probably just sitting in my fucking parking lot is what youre doing��..nigger.

ill be your huckleberry. jordan. what are you doing today. come to portland and play football. 2 o� clock. we need you. youre the most athletic and most physically gifted man that i know. youre gorgeous. i love you. bye.

yeah jordan this is grandpa. i just want to wish you a happy birthday and i was wondering if you got my card that i sent you down to corvallis. well talk to you later and i hope you had a nice birthday today. bye.

hi jordan, this is teresa. um well i uh, i dont know if you got my other message. but our phone isnt ringing. we can call out but it wont ring. we dont have any power here. its about three o� clock now and um we um have to go mikes gonna bring me over to mcminnville to work and we are going to get there around 4 probably and be there for an hour because we are going to use the showers. you can call my cell phone at any time if you need to um get a message to me or whatever. bye.

jordan. its justin. quick. its ben. hes hurt. uh no, its about 11 o� clock on�im on lindseys phone�on sunday. im calling about lost episodes. im wondering if the very last episode is a two hour one or a one hour one. because im on it. and it is good. ive tasted the fruit of the island�and it is moist�.and good�.its me, JB drake.

i want to see him. i dont want to take a nap. i want to see him.

may thy mustache groweth to unbelievable heights. may it be so uncontrollable that not even god could imagine the weight of its fury. brian kinney. captains log. out.

hey its mike. i was wondering if you could bring up your lost or like the season one or something for that too, so i could start watching those. and i have that charthouse thing again so dont forget to bring that up or something because i need to find out what you want to see if you can make that. im sure you can its like the 19th or something so dont forget to have me show you that. anyways talk to you later bye.

jeez. the first time i call you and you dont even pick up. gosh. anyways, happy christmas eve hope youre doing well...happy birthday. talk to you soon bye.

hello my precious son. im just calling because i wanted to wish you a very happy new years and if youre driving to seattle i wanted you to be very very very careful please and�just that i love you loads. and i hope that next year proves to be profitable and wonderful both emotionally, financially, physically�you name it. ok im done being stupid. i love you goodbye.

freeman. i gotta let you in on a little secret. on something i just found out. shooting sizemore. a follow up to breaking bonaduce is on is on vh1 starting next year. following none other than our good friend tom sizemore. the one man who could be better than danny bonaduce. call me back for more details.

well hello there sugar tits. well you have nothing to worry about from me, i will be nothing but safe. in that i have to work tomorrow morning at 6 o� clock . but such is life. im leaving for montana tomorrow afternoon. i work till three and then im on the road and on the way i cant wait to get the fuck out of vancouver. i hate it. i hate it. i hate the fucking people that live here. theyre just white trash pieces of shit people. theyre trash jordan. theyre fucking trash. i havent seen such bad teeth since i watch austin powers. my dear god. find a fucking toothbrush and put it in your mouth. anyways hopefully you have a merry new year and you get nice and wasted and have sex with some nice person�.male, female. i dont really care and uh�yeah you have a great night and i will talk to you later. Bye.

jordan man, its the G. just calling to wish you a happy new year, i hope youre having a good time tonight. 2007 will be a wonderful year. i love you very much my man and ill talk to you soon�and i have two other men who would like to say the same thing�
hello jordan. this is aaron simpson. i know i kicked your ass at stats 351, but no hard feelings. happy new year.
jordan. brian david kinney. i dont apologize for not showing up for the christmas picture because you deserve better. and i can promise you this: what happened between me, you, michael spear and justin davis in your apartment in arizona will go to the grave with me. heavyweights for life. i love you. happy new year. twenty-o-seven.

heyyy jordan noe. this is sarah cutsforth. on behalf of brian gjurgevich, brian Kinney, aaron simpson and jacqueline gjurgevich and a bunch of other poeple up in washington that you might not have met yet, i just wanted to call you and wish you a happy new year. i dont know if you said you were going to spend it with steak or with sarah or with ashton or with ryan seacrest�but i pretty much hope that i catch you soon after this whole bitch begins. so now that its 1-1-o� seven, lets start planning our next reenactment. i dont think that sounded like i know english, after that last sentence. so i apologize because there was vodka involved and champagne involved and you know what, that was just the end of it. and FYI jack gjurgevich�jacqueline�female also specified that if someone calls your past employer they may only speculate on the tenure of you. so if you were employed to a place thats all they are able to ask. i dont know if that helps you plight but�.nevermind. im sorry but..
�this is for you�
�its jordan noes voce mail�
jordan noe i love you.
thats it, thats all you want to say?
happy new year. year of the shrimp.
...anyways that was brian. but anyway�have a good new year, i hope you are recognizing it in an admirable fashion. i really dont understand why it went to your voice mail, but i assume this is completely clogging you up and im going to hang up and speak to you soon after. adios jordan noe. all the best.