05.16.02 - 11:35 am

i was standing infront of a massive 8 foot long fish tank, positioned where my tv should have been in my bonus room. it was huge, beautiful, everything i had wanted. my sisters were over by the couches, looking at it like it was some dull boring rock they had just picked from inside their shoe. my excitement was startled by a loud crack. similar to the popping sounds a fire makes. there was another loud pop and then i noticed that the floor seemed to sag somewhat. not too much, just enough to be noticeable. my sisters looked at each other. another series of snaps. the floor seemed to bounce now. my sisters crouched, arms out in panic. the floor was caving in. i turned to the fish tank. the weight of the water was collapsing the floor of my bonus room. crap.

i heard a shout from somewhere that firemen were on their way. we should get out. everything is going to come crashing down. sprinklers showered now from the ceiling, dousing out fires that werent there. the firemen were on their way after all.

i ran to the landing just before my staircase to be pushed aside by several firemen, greasy, sweating, wild eyes of excitement. they didnt talk. they shouted. everything. one grabbed me by the arm and yelled, "do you have any smaller tanks??" i told him i had a 10 gallon, you know, but, its so small, and theres alot of stuff in that 1000 gallon tank over there....

he began fragmenting the corals i had in the big tank into small chunks, leaving behind the massive structures of a coral reef in the bigger tank. these fragments would grow back to an impressive size, i knew, but, it would just take forever. and who wants a 10 gallon when you can have a 1000 gallon fish tank? i was escorted out of the house, and faced a multitude of police cars, flashing lights and friends. the police shouted too. yelling at me to move, get out of the way, leave.

i didnt feel like it.

so i antogonized them. taunted them. they readied their bean bag round guns and i dared them to shoot me. so they did.

what was supposed to be a highpowered block of rubber and steel pellets was nothing more than the consistency of a nerf arrow. it bounced off me, my arms spread wide in fearless pose. i asked them to do it again. so they did. it too bounced off me like a foam hacky sac. so, to continue my annoyances of them, i picked up the two foam bags at my feet...and threw them at the officers.

this started a huge chain of throwing things. a food fight made of bean bag rounds, pine cones, anything that could be launched by hand. the cops threw things at me and my friends. and we threw things back at them. but we were smiling. everyone. then the throwing got old and evolved into wrestling. so now there were dozens of cops wrestling, giggling, laughing, smiling, pinning down and being pinned by and with all of my friends. one cop was on my back, my face against the ground, and smiling i looked over at my friend nathan, who was also on his stomach pinned by a laughing police officer. when i caught my breath finally, still lightly laughing i said, "somebody needs to get a fucking picture of this."

and nathan responded calmly, but with a warm jovial smile, "yeah, someone needs to get a fucking picture."