05.24.05 - 10:07 pm

ah yes. growing up. growing up and julia toler.

soon russell will be gone. up in portland. soon julia will be gone...but i dont think ill be allowed to notice. inspite of the random and infrequent text messaged "hi", she has become nonexistant in my life since december.
i went out to see her.
i came back with debt, and a good friend who found other areas to consume her. namely adan.

jealous? yes.

i miss her. i dont like this. but it seems to happen every year or two that she goes on a stint of not talking to me, usually because of something ive done or said. if i remember correctly, we usually stop talking because of my disagreements with her behavior and activities.

i want her one way, and she wishes to do hers.
she wants me one way, and i tend to do my way instead.

well, youre out there, somewhere. i hope youre doing well. i hope youre happy. i hope you laugh alot. i hope youre relieved youll be home soon and away from this place. i hope you know i miss you, and think about you all the time.