02.05.14 - 1:01 pm

alright florida, youre really working too hard to be an asshole. im about ready to call off our blind date.

pro rated rent $434.63
first months rent $1295
last months rent $1295
security deposit $1295
application fee $100
HOA application fee $25
electricity deposit $200
electricity application fee $15
water/sewer deposit $100
water/sewer application fee $25

what the fuck is with all the goddamn fees and deposits? i dont remember ever having to pay a deposit on a fucking utility. not only that, but instead of then taking your first months bill out of your deposit, they hold onto it.

the electricity utility company holds on to your deposit for something like 24 months.

the water/sewer utility company holds on to your deposit for 60 GODDAMN MONTHS.

so, before we can even get the keys to new rental house we need to front $4,784.

absolutely incredible. this job better be worth it.